I can't believe Christmas is in a week and a half, seems like Dec has flown by. I got stuff from my 12 days of christmas craft swap (finally), and I'm a little disappointed. She got extra time because she sent late. Some of it is pretty... but its not really my taste. I know in a swap you can't totally cater to a person's interests if it falls outside of your crafting abilites, but it seemed as though she just really wanted to use her cricuit machine. I got, as a small a set of scrapbooking cutout, "green living" themed. I don't scrapbook... or have a particular interest in "green" themed stuff. They're perfectly cute, but nothing I'm at all interested. There was a nice torchwood theme bracelet, and she tried on a tardis tea wallet and a tardis tote. My "big" item was a skirt (I had asked for a skirt to wear to work). It doesn't fit... i might be able to tailor it. I understand when you can't have the person try it on as your making it, you have to guess. However, the waistband isn't finished and it isn't lined. I'm hoping I can maybe salvage it. She made me a cute half apron... but it wasn't something I asked for. She had asked me all of these questions about my quilting.... but nothing was quilt themed. Lesson learned I guess. I can't do these christmas swaps, I've been disappointed both time. I put a lot of effort in and got things that I did't feel took as much effort back.

2 weekends ago, K and B came down and hung out. It was really nice and I got to talk about a lot of stuff with them (which inturn let me talk about some stuff with Hubby) and made me feel somewhat better.

Trying to not kill E about school stuff. I know teenagers are "irresponsible", I'm sure I was to an extent, but difference was, I didn't screw about about school stuff, I knew my parents couldn't pay for it. I think she has it in her head that her dad and her mom (HA!) each have more money set aside than is reality. Or that she'll get given money through colleges. Umm... newsflash, you usually have to APPLY to get things like that. Also, she's middle class, white, good grades -- in a word, average. Not that it's a bad thing, but in terms of college money, she doesn't stand out -- she's not a minority or the first in her family to go to college, she's not valedictorian or plays sports.

I have another hour of scanning (its one of those weeks at work) then I'm going to try to swing by the mall to fuel G and my sister's Monster High habit.

Podcasts have become my new addiction (yes, I'm slow - I think they've been around for like 5+ years). I've been listening to Radio Free Burrito and The Nerdist.
Wil Wheaton - totally a nerd crush. I never watched Star Trek next generation, but I adore him in Big Bang Theory and the Guild. His writing is great, his stories and his blog. I really like his stories about parenting. He's a step-parent too, so it gives me a little faith I can do this whien I think I can't.
Chris Hardwick -- I used to love him on Singled Out. His podcast is hilarious, and nerdy, and he loves Doctor Who..'nuff said.

I'm starting to hate the holidays. All the baby mama drama, it's just draining and frustrating. It makes me feel used and marginalized a lot of the time. Its their mom - I get that, I don't want to replace her, or be her or whatever. It's just really frustrating to do all the day to day stuff, and the extras, and if she does something even semi-decent (or I don't know... expected) - we're shit upon like we don't do anything at all for the kids.
I've sort of decided that for the month of Dec (til we get both kids for christmas), I'm stepping back. I'm not doing any extra stuff, I'm not helping or offering without being asked politely.

Yesterday, for example, I get "you should make gingerbread cookies, I want to decorate them", "I want to watch an episode of Glee, can I watch the dvds in my room" (I just got that set for a present from my sister), "here, my mom thought you could take me here" (handing me a card for a bead shop)" "I want to watch it" (Pushing next me on the couch and wanting me to play monster high episode on my laptop). And then a big fight about Girl Scouts and making commitments and not backing out of them.
Acting like she's being punished for having to go to Girl Scouts. I asked multiple times this summer did she still want to do it, she said yes. So I signed her up. I've bought her a new shirt for it and sold candy for the fall product sale, and taken her to the meetings. She has proceeded to act like a spoiled brat at every meeting and it's embarassing. It's a waste of my time, and it makes me look bad. I'd quit taking her, but I'm trying to make the point of you don't commit to something and then flake (LIKE HER MOM DOES ALL THE TIME!).

I was going to rant some more... but I don't feel great, maybe later :P